


The Flowers that Grow Inside Me

by Overlord_of_Pairings



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Eventual Fluff, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, Hanahaki Disease, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-01
Updated: 2018-12-01
Packaged: 2019-09-05 06:51:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 816
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16805599
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Overlord_of_Pairings/pseuds/Overlord_of_Pairings
Summary: Hinata loves Takeda, and has hanahaki because of it. Takeda loves Hinata, and has hanahaki because of it.Hinata doesn't want to get the operation and lose how he feels. Takeda feels guilty about his feelings and plans to remove them via operation, but doesn't know how he would explain his absence.Things get painful for both parties, for more than one reason.





	The Flowers that Grow Inside Me

Okay, this wasn't exactly how he'd planned to tell everyone.

Actually, he hadn't planned to tell anyone at all, but apparently, the universe decided to make him tell.

He stared down at the petals on the ground in slight horror. Hydrangeas. Probably the most painful flowers his body could have chosen for him to cough up. He'd looked up their meaning the very first time he threw them up - apparently, they symbolized heartfelt emotions and perserverance.

Perserverance... How fitting, he thought, eyes making their way up to look at Takeda, who was still staring at him in horror, along with everyone else in the gym.

However, his gaze seemed to snap the teacher out of his mindless trance. "H-Hinata-kun! You need to stop practice! Until you're better!" he shouted, rushing to his side to help him stand. It was an unnecessary gesture, but it was also an appreciated one.

"Why?" he rasped. "I've been practicing all this time, and I've been fine..."

"I thought you looked like you've been in pain," Kageyama said, glaring angrily at Hinata. "Dumbass. If you have this stupid flower disease, you shouldn't be practicing. You're straining your lungs."

"He's right," Ukai said with an annoyed sigh. "Until you get your operation, or until the person returns your feelings, you're not playing anymore."

Hinata's eyes widened in horror. "No! I can still play!" he cried, shoving Takeda's hand away. "Please don't make me stop! Takeda-sensei, do something! Don't let him do that!" he said, when Ukai didn't budge.

"I'm sorry, Hinata-kun," Takeda said, looking genuinely remorseful. "I know you love volleyball, but we really do need to postpone your playing until this is resolved."

Hinata felt tears streaming down his cheeks, and he turned to run out of the gym. He didn't bother to go change out of his sweaty clothes, he only ran. He ran down past the bike rack, ran towards the path that led to his home. He didn't get far, though, not far past the school gate. Kageyama had been right - he was straining his lungs. He keeled over on the sidewalk, coughing and hacking until more white petals and flowers fell from his mouth.

"Hinata-kun?"

Hinata looked up, and through tear-blurred vision, he saw Takeda, smiling gently down at him. The teacher held up his school bag. "You left this."

Slowly, on wobbling legs, Hinata stood, and took the bag with a soft 'thank you'.

"I know it's hard to hear that you can't play volleyball, even for a little while," Takeda said softly. "But it's not forever-"

"Yes it is," Hinata interrupted. "It is forever."

Takeda paused. "Hinata... What are you talking about? It's only until you get the operation. It's not..." His eyes widened, and he sucked in a sharp breath.

"...You're not getting it, are you?"

Hinata swallowed, the action irritating the scratches and wounds in his throat. "No. No, I'm not. I don't want to lose how I feel."

"Hinata-kun, that's not... You can't think about it like that," Takeda said softly. "I mean, it's true, sure, but if you don't get that operation, you'll die. These feelings that you don't want to lose are actually killing you, Hinata. This person who doesn't love you back is killing you. Are you really going to let them do that?"

Hinata felt tears stinging in his eyes. "It's not like he's doing it on purpose," he said, voice strained with the effort from holding back his tears. "He doesn't know I love him. I know that if he did, he'd feel so guilty. He'd do everything he could to try and fall for me, too, but I don't want that."

"Why not?"

"Because it wouldn't be genuine." Hinata let out a soft, bitter laugh. "I know it wouldn't matter to the disease, but... It would matter to me. I would want him to fall for me because he wanted to, not because he wanted to keep me from dying. And besides that..." He paused, and shook his head. "Never mind."

With that, Hinata turned, planning to continue his walk home. "Hinata-kun," Takeda whispered. But he seemed to think better of whatever he was planning to say, because he hesitated, then said, "Don't you usually take your bike?"

Hinata hesitated, then smiled at Takeda. "Walking would be less of a strain on my lungs, don't you think?"

Takeda gave a weak nod that Hinata didn't see. He watched the first-year walk away with glassy eyes.

Only when Hinata was out of earshot, thankfully, did Takeda feel something scratching his throat. He gave a cough, and then another, until he was hacking out orange lily petals.

Distantly, he remembered what those meant. 'Passion and pride, huh...?' He looked up in the direction Hinata had gone, and gave a bitter smile.

He wouldn't tell him, he decided. Hinata didn't need his feelings piling onto all his other problems.


End file.
